The reason I want to try to get the trip to Starved Rock going within the next weeks or so being that I want to get my mind off what came down on the 20th of April, the Columbine anniversery as well as the day of when I got accused of child abuse. That was the weeks leading into my actually signing into the hospital -- actually might get outing done on the very day of the anniversery of when I signed myself into the hospital. I signed myself into the hospital on May 5th, 1999, being that I knew that something was very wrong with me and I did not know what it was. That was the day I learned that I had a depressive illness, and when they took me in to do the MMPI testing is when I learned of the bipolar diagnosis. I was trying to enlist into the Army at the time but it was on a snap descision and could not find my DD2-14's from when I was in the Navy. So that was more the reason I want to do the trip -- to get the memory of the nightmare off my mind. I have a lot of nightmares about that day because of the fact I get the inquisition dreams at times and sometimes those are the ones that really scare me because I keep thinking my **** is going to hate me, like how I hate my biological father.
I think that is the reason I write so much, being that I have a lot on the mind and the reason I travel as much as I do. I have a wanderlust at times which I cannot seem to stop at times. I never travel by Greyhound though -- cramped quarters. The sleeper cars are cramped quarters but at least I was able to lay down if I was feeling ill.
I think that is the reason I write so much, being that I have a lot on the mind and the reason I travel as much as I do. I have a wanderlust at times which I cannot seem to stop at times. I never travel by Greyhound though -- cramped quarters. The sleeper cars are cramped quarters but at least I was able to lay down if I was feeling ill.
5 comments:
I'm still trying to understand how he managed to spell wanderlust correctly. It must have been accidental.
You know the whole Monte Carlo situation, where you have an infinite number of monkeys on an infinite number of typewriters?
Nicky escaped from that room.
Um...can anyone say 'morally bankrupt'???
I wonder if this is why he mother nad stepfather won't let him stay with them. They have a teenage daughter. Nicky probably got mad and hit her or something like that.
That was supposed to be "his mother" and "and".
I've read so much of his stuff that I'm starting to write like him. Lord have mercy!
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